Wow, there's a lot going on right now. I don't have a whole lot of time to go into crazy detail, but I'll do what I can.
Firstly, the past few nights have not been a whole lot of fun work-wise. I haven't done very much work so far this quarter, for various reasons, but finally we had some big stuff due this week, and I definitely was dreading getting smacked in the face.
Well, somehow, the smack in the face that I was so sure I would get never really came. Sure, last night I worked pretty solidly from about 7:30 to 2 in the morning, not too bad, but still plenty of work on a single project. It was crazy though, yesterday was my night to lead small group. I don't know exactly how to describe it, but personally for me something felt different than all the other times I've planned for small groups. I was reading through the section we were going to talk about, and it was actually having an impact on me, and as I began to look at cross-references and such, I was actually getting excited about all of the ways different parts of the bible were connecting to each other. I know, it sounds crazy, actually being excited about what the bible had to say for our bible study, but it was happening. I don't know what's going on.
Anyway, I hope the study meant something to the rest of the guys, but I just left it feeling like God had been speaking through it to me in very cool ways. I was just very thankful for all of those guys and the different things each one of them brings to the table. They're awesome.
It's crazy to be starting to see some real purpose and plan for me the past few weeks. I have been able to spend time with so many awesome people and have been so disgustingly blessed by all the different kinds of relationships of mine that have grown in the past few weeks. It's crazy to actually be feeling like God is using me. It's especially crazy when in those same situations God is using the other person to help and grow me in huge ways, too. It's pretty incredible, and I'm learning more every day about what its truly like to support another person.
I've figured something out in the past few days. Through the purpose I've seen, I'm really understanding deep in my soul that this was right and is exactly the way things were meant to be. Truly figuring that out and understanding it has been huge in the fact that it has erased a lot of questions in me that have driven me crazy recently, questions about me wondering if this was a mistake and my mistake and if I messed up something truly good. Knowing that deep in my heart at my core has brought me a whole lot of peace. Unfortunately, knowing this was meant to be doesn't really help with some of the day-to-day emotional pain of things, but it is getting better.
I'm hoping to really be able to stay focused for this second half of the quarter, and continue all of the amazing ways God's been working in my life. I hope that I can work to give everything over to him and learn to really listen for his guidance. I know there are still going to plenty of moments when things suck as they have, but I know that the process of going through hard times will only make us stronger if we choose to learn and grow from it. Granted, my current suffering is somewhat different from the suffering of early Christians, but I think God knew what he was doing.
1 Peter 5:10
And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.
Awesome.
So tomorrow night a few of us are going to the "Magic of Disney" show the Cincinnati Pops are doing with ccm alum Ashley Brown. Needless to say, I'm incredibly excited. I love it when true Disney magic shows up outside of the theme parks (the Disney Fountain Show at Station Square back home is a great example of Disney magic done right). So anyway, because of that, I'm in a magical mood and am feeling inspired to give you some relevant Disney lyrics, too.
Enjoy these, my friends:
I have often dreamed
Of a far off place
Where a hero's welcome
Would be waiting for me
Where the crowds will cheer
When they see my face
And a voice keeps saying
This is where I'm meant to be
I'll be there someday
I can go the distance
I will find my way
If I can be strong
I know every mile
Will be worth my while
When I go the distance
I'll be right where I belong
Down an unknown road
To embrace my fate
Though that road may wander
It will lead me to you
And a thousand years
Would be worth the wait
It might take a lifetime
But somehow I'll see it through
And I won't look back
I can go the distance
And I'll stay on track
No, I won't accept defeat
It's an uphill slope
But I won't lose hope
'Till I go the distance
And my journey is complete
But to look beyond the glory is the hardest part
For a hero's strength is measured by his heart
Like a shooting star
I will go the distance
I will search the world
I will face it's harms
I don't care how far
I can go the distance
'Till I find my hero's welcome
Waiting in your arms
I will search the world
I will face it's harms
'Till I find my hero's welcome
Waiting in your arms
I am just feeling very stoked about life.
There is so much awesome stuff in store for every one of us. Will you fight for it or let it pass you by?
Hey, thanks for humoring me, and more importantly for loving me.
I love you all so much.
Alex
Firstly, the past few nights have not been a whole lot of fun work-wise. I haven't done very much work so far this quarter, for various reasons, but finally we had some big stuff due this week, and I definitely was dreading getting smacked in the face.
Well, somehow, the smack in the face that I was so sure I would get never really came. Sure, last night I worked pretty solidly from about 7:30 to 2 in the morning, not too bad, but still plenty of work on a single project. It was crazy though, yesterday was my night to lead small group. I don't know exactly how to describe it, but personally for me something felt different than all the other times I've planned for small groups. I was reading through the section we were going to talk about, and it was actually having an impact on me, and as I began to look at cross-references and such, I was actually getting excited about all of the ways different parts of the bible were connecting to each other. I know, it sounds crazy, actually being excited about what the bible had to say for our bible study, but it was happening. I don't know what's going on.
Anyway, I hope the study meant something to the rest of the guys, but I just left it feeling like God had been speaking through it to me in very cool ways. I was just very thankful for all of those guys and the different things each one of them brings to the table. They're awesome.
It's crazy to be starting to see some real purpose and plan for me the past few weeks. I have been able to spend time with so many awesome people and have been so disgustingly blessed by all the different kinds of relationships of mine that have grown in the past few weeks. It's crazy to actually be feeling like God is using me. It's especially crazy when in those same situations God is using the other person to help and grow me in huge ways, too. It's pretty incredible, and I'm learning more every day about what its truly like to support another person.
I've figured something out in the past few days. Through the purpose I've seen, I'm really understanding deep in my soul that this was right and is exactly the way things were meant to be. Truly figuring that out and understanding it has been huge in the fact that it has erased a lot of questions in me that have driven me crazy recently, questions about me wondering if this was a mistake and my mistake and if I messed up something truly good. Knowing that deep in my heart at my core has brought me a whole lot of peace. Unfortunately, knowing this was meant to be doesn't really help with some of the day-to-day emotional pain of things, but it is getting better.
I'm hoping to really be able to stay focused for this second half of the quarter, and continue all of the amazing ways God's been working in my life. I hope that I can work to give everything over to him and learn to really listen for his guidance. I know there are still going to plenty of moments when things suck as they have, but I know that the process of going through hard times will only make us stronger if we choose to learn and grow from it. Granted, my current suffering is somewhat different from the suffering of early Christians, but I think God knew what he was doing.
1 Peter 5:10
And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast.
Awesome.
So tomorrow night a few of us are going to the "Magic of Disney" show the Cincinnati Pops are doing with ccm alum Ashley Brown. Needless to say, I'm incredibly excited. I love it when true Disney magic shows up outside of the theme parks (the Disney Fountain Show at Station Square back home is a great example of Disney magic done right). So anyway, because of that, I'm in a magical mood and am feeling inspired to give you some relevant Disney lyrics, too.
Enjoy these, my friends:
I have often dreamed
Of a far off place
Where a hero's welcome
Would be waiting for me
Where the crowds will cheer
When they see my face
And a voice keeps saying
This is where I'm meant to be
I'll be there someday
I can go the distance
I will find my way
If I can be strong
I know every mile
Will be worth my while
When I go the distance
I'll be right where I belong
Down an unknown road
To embrace my fate
Though that road may wander
It will lead me to you
And a thousand years
Would be worth the wait
It might take a lifetime
But somehow I'll see it through
And I won't look back
I can go the distance
And I'll stay on track
No, I won't accept defeat
It's an uphill slope
But I won't lose hope
'Till I go the distance
And my journey is complete
But to look beyond the glory is the hardest part
For a hero's strength is measured by his heart
Like a shooting star
I will go the distance
I will search the world
I will face it's harms
I don't care how far
I can go the distance
'Till I find my hero's welcome
Waiting in your arms
I will search the world
I will face it's harms
'Till I find my hero's welcome
Waiting in your arms
I am just feeling very stoked about life.
There is so much awesome stuff in store for every one of us. Will you fight for it or let it pass you by?
Hey, thanks for humoring me, and more importantly for loving me.
I love you all so much.
Alex
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